Fathers
By
Joni Villemez-Comeaux
In thinking about the importance of a Dad and the role they play in their children's lives I think about the type of Dad I had. My Dad was a one-of-a-kind type of Dad. Not a one size fits all. I used to get aggravated with him when I was growing up, when I would hear others talk of things their Dad did or said, wanting to hear or experience their Dad's version. I spent many years focusing on what all Dad wasn't doing as my Dad. Well, thankfully, I acquired a new pair of glasses in which to see my Dad and I saw him in a whole new light. I saw all of the areas where he did love me and showed me he loved me. Love was an action for my Dad. Not mere words, so I started watching his actions.
As a teenager, I found a lot of trouble to get into. I would end up being embarrassed or ashamed of myself. When I went to my Dad to guide me out of the messes I had created he would say, laughingly, “The only time you have a problem is if you can't laugh about it”, followed by “First, see you're right, then do it”. I would lighten up with myself enough to see a solution and an action that I could take to get back on the right path. “Don't tell me what you're going to do, show me” he would say. What my Dad taught me here was that it's OK to laugh at myself sometimes and to take care of myself. Self acceptance comes first along with my action plan.
When I think about my Dad's personality, I remember a bold and vibrant man who lived life to the fullest. Dad took a lot of risks in his life business wise and was very successful. He left a very comfy refinery job in the mid 70's with a wife and 3 small children at home to support. He did this in order to begin his own business. Dad lived life on his own terms and was not shy about letting us know that. What Dad taught me here was to be bold, vibrant and fiercely independent. He taught me this by modeling these things to me. “Watch what I do Joni, not what I say. The winds going to blow and people are going to talk, you have to watch their actions” he would tell me. Again, his life was all about action.
I feel privileged to have experienced my Dad first hand in this life. May his lessons live on through me and the rest of my family........
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